The 11th Annual Del Close Marathon

Taking place at three theaters in New York, taking a ton of the good performers from the UCB LA and stealing them off to New York for a weekend... This marathon has caused me so much grief... I WISH I WAS THERE. It runs ALL NIGHT and just seems like the most fun ever had... Fuck... Three straight days of delirious, sleep deprived, drunken improv!? Uhhh yes please!! Not to mention all the special classes that people are teaching that weekend. Every picture I look at makes it that much worse to be sitting here in LA. No good shows to watch here, sketch class was canceled because my teacher is gone, just... ugh. Next year, I will fucking be there because now I know it exists far enough in advance that I have no excuse not to be able to afford it. I think the performers that are still in LA are as upset as me... I just need to stay off Facebook and Twitter so that I don't see anymore pictures or anymore "I've slept 6 hours in 48 hours! DCM!" posts. Le sigh...


Next year... at the 12th annual... Elizabeth and I will fucking be there... Just warning you now
body, mind, liver, and New York.

Cassandra and Leigh Pajamarama!

My good friend Leigh and I have decided to work on a two person show that we're going to try to weasel into whatever theater will take us. We'll see how it goes... I'm attempting to write for it right now and well... I ended up on my blog. I have the Sex in the City movie on and had to put down my knitting in exchange for my laptop, but still that Mozilla icon is so much more appealing that the icon for Final Draft. Hmmm what to write about... I watched Paper Heart last night. Not as amazing as I expected, but I still recommend it. 500 days of Summer met my expectations and I recommend also. But nobody reads this yet... Oh well. Back to the two person show... It'll be a nice combination of "real time life" with sketches and videos. We'll change up the dialogue every month to keep it fresh and to keep doing it.

I'm also thinking I need to revisit my guitar and teach myself to play the damn thing and write some songs. Not serious songs, I have nothing serious to say. But fun parody or original silly songs. My most recent inspiration for this was watching Sarah Silverman perform her little "I love you more than..." song on stage. Obviously she isn't the only inspiration to bring music to my comedy, but hers was so cute. And I love her and her sense of humor. Similar to mine. I think... On that note, I feel like I'm done blogging. I'm breaking out the guitar. Meaning I'm pushing off writing material for Leigh and I's show even longer and focusing on my own personal projects. Typical me.


I love you more than Jews love money

Moon People

So Demetri Martin is in pre-production for this movie he wrote the screenplay for called "Moon People". There's not much information about it except that he is going to star in it and he wrote it. The best overview I found said it was about people who were sent to the moon to colonize return to earth. I assume mayhem and hilarity ensues from there. So I've decided I'm going to do whatever I can to bother my acting coach who works close with my old agency who hopefully is going to sign me back next month to get me an audition for that movie. Even if it's a small part. I'm a huge fan of Demetri and even if I don't meet him, I feel like it's a good goal to shoot for. I assume they haven't started casting for it because there is literally NO information about this film. Unless it's like super secret project... but why?


oh yes Cassandra, I definitly want you in my movie. What? You definitly want me inside you? Well, okay. But only because I look like all rugged and sex god ish in this picture you chose for your blog.

So that's the plan. I'll keep updates about it. Nobody reads this yet, but man it's gonna be cool if I end up in the movie and I have proof that I called it.

Til then, I must admit that I've been trying to make a really shitty mixtape and can always think of like one or two songs and download entire albums and then end up enjoying them. I think this means I have awful taste in music... I wanted some poppy dumb Jason Mraz song for the shitty mixtape but now am listening to the whole album. It has lifted my spirts. wtf Jason, quit being so happy go lucky. alright i'm done with this post.

Cassandra Loves The New York Knicks

So I'm going to try really hard this year to get into basketball because not unlike many other sports I sort of just listen to what my brother says occasionally to be mildly updated on what's going on. Then there is baseball that for the most part, I take it upon myself to know what's going on. SO the Lakers won the NBA Championship this past season and I felt like an idiot because I had no clue what was going on. This October, I will be Miss Basketball and follow it like I follow baseball. Maybe even more closely because, sorry Dodgers, but basketball is a bit more entertaining to watch the entire game without being on Facebook or cleaning my apartment at the same time. However, Lakers and Clippers fans annoy me so I'm going with what I see is the next best thing: The Knicks. This doesn't make sense to anyone but me, because The Knicks honestly didn't do that great last season and this upcoming season is rumored to be no exception for many different reasons BUT i'll explain why The Knicks are for me: (if I ever marry a Knicks fan and they ask how a Cali girl got into that team, I officially can't tell them some meanful story about it because I'm choosing to make my dumb and totally shallow reasoning public domain)

1.) probably the most important, LOTS OF HOT JEWISH GUYS IN NEW YORK. Also, lots of hot New York jewish guys that love basketball. In turn, another (amongst the many) thing that makes me more attractive to my future born into Judism but probably not super practicing Jewish Hilarious Tall husband that if he exsists I have yet to meet him.

2.) in picking a team other than the Lakers and Clippers, The Denver Nuggets popped into my mind because I did spend 11 yrs old my childhood in Colorado. But honestly... I like being in New York much more than being in Colorado. I'm perfectly content being one of those types who can only live in New York or Los Angeles because those two places are so different from the rest of the US. I've heard it descibed as "NYC and LA are like two bubbles connected by JetBlue and seperate from the world". So sorry childhood, but I'll root for the Broncos but that's about it...

3.) speaking of The Broncos: their colors are orange and blue and so are The Knicks! My dad LOVED the Broncos and they are my favorite football team, so those colors mean a lot.

4.) My brother thinks rooting for The Knicks is an AWFUL idea. That's a lot of incentive to continue rooting for this team because when they do come out and start being a super kick ass team (whenever that does eventually happen) I'll get such joy from being right in the end. Steve (my brother) seems to think it will require them to build a new stadium for The Knicks to play at outside of the middle of the city because Madison Square Garden is really really old. Along with that, he says The Knicks can't afford anyone decent and rich people in New York get taxed the most in the entire country so no rich basketball player wants to move there. Disagree all you want with all this because I do. I do simply because I'm so dead set on loving The Knicks, but maybe you know what he's talking about. And by "you" I mean nobody of course because I'm unaccomplished still and I present nobody any reason to read this blog. But hey, maybe someday someone who is super obsessed with me will spend a few hours on the internet and will watch and read everything I've ever done and skim through this...

So in conclusion, be prepared to see me in a blue and orange sweatshirt and rooting for my new favorite basketball team the New York Knicks haha!

imdb is always fun to explore around

I searched Jack black on imdb, and ended up on a porno star's page. Star of such films as "Don't look now, but there's a cock in you ass." Not joking. Along with 822 other films made between now and 1973. One year younger than my mother. Thought I'd share, I thought it was funny.

Sprite commercial

Not one that I'm in, just a crazy rejected one to racy for Germany I guess. It's intense and hilarious haha. It's cut off for some reason on the blog but all that sprite is being shot out of a sprite bottle, not his dick. The bottle is however positioned as if it were his dick....

Headshots and heat waves

Nobody reads this, but if you happen to be a decent photographer in LA in the mood to do some simple FREE headshots, please contact me at cassandracardenes@gmail.com. I'm in desperate need of some quickly and would pay for some but since money is so tight I really don't want my agent to just see my new ones with my new hair then refer me to another photographer, which has happened before and is very frustrating...

ON THAT NOTE... It is insanely hot in the Valley. It has been for the past couple of weeks and honestly feel like I might melt before September arrives. I'm trying to think of some elaborate plan to somehow make it possible to move over the hill into actual Hollywood as soon and possible and take the heat down a few degrees. I think the only way that will be possible is teaming up with my lovely mother and sharing rent on some fabulous rental home in Los Feliz... with a pool. Dare to dream...

Soo yeah not much else to write about... I will recommend the movie Seeing Other People. I watched it yesterday on the Sundance Channel and it was pretty interesting. Jay Mohr and Andy Richter are in it. About two engaged people sleeping with other people before they get married and as you can guess that doesn't work. Anddd.... I'll post this video because Stella is amazing and my last post was going on about David Wain:

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.