Thursday, January 21, 2010

This may prevent me from ever getting a date again...

So something that's been on the brain lately is how fucking crazy girls are. I myself am also in this crazy girl category so don't think I'm shit talking girls. A lot of girls say they 'have all guy friends because I don't get along with girls' and what I'm going to talk about may be why. Either that or their sluts and they don't get along with girls because their main goal in life is to only fuck guys regardless of who they are dating. <-------- crazy person's opinion on girls that don't have girlfriends...
When a girl likes a guy she for some reason gets taken over by the constant want to talk to them and see them and whatnot and so if it takes a guy like more than 10 minutes to answer a text message, or if a guy can't hang out for whatever reason, instantly they become public enemy number one. That is of course until the guy makes contact with the girl again, then they are amazing and perfect. This fluctuation of emotions fascinates me. Why is it that if I text a guy at 5:02PM and don't receive a response until 10AM the next day saying "Sorry my phone was being stupid, I wasn't ignoring you", I COMPLETELY forget how I felt between the hours of about 5:05PM-10AM when the text came. Because as I recall while waiting for your text message I FUCKING HATED YOU. You were an asshole, you were a douche, I acted like I didn't care about you, I brought up every girl you also hang out with and even called HER a slut, I was in a weird mood the whole night, I checked my phone about 789 times, etc. I went on an emotional roller coaster and then the whole slate was wiped clean when you texted me again in the morning. How is that possible?
Normally I would instantly say this was a problem with me and I must be bipolar but it really isn't just me, it's every girl I talk to. You see a girl at a party who likes a boy named John, you say to the girl "Hey where's John?" she typically responds, "I don't know, I texted him earlier, he's acting weird. Whatever I don't care." FUCKING LIAR!!! You do care!!! John could have been at work the whole night and didn't see your text, but he is 'acting weird'! It doesn't make sense!!!
Same with Facebook and Twitter and all that shit. Thank goodness Facebook isn't like Myspace used to be where you could see whether or not a message had been read because there was nothing more aggravating then seeing a read message without a reply. But don't worry world we still get pissed if we can see that you are on Facebook and aren't replying to our messages or wall posts. But these internets sites allow a whole new type of stalking that can help or hurt a guy. Also for as much as girls stalk guys, we like to assume you read whatever we tweet or write on Facebook so we'll do little things to make you jealous which sometimes backfires and turns guys off to us. But I assume guys do that too... Or at least thats what girls will say to their friend Stacey when the guy she likes, Jimmy, tweets that he is 'Hangin with @Karen.' Don't worry Stacey, he's just trying to make you jealous... But then again, probably not.
Even a girl with a boyfriend is insane. Well at least Cuban girls. I've been referring to a thing called Cuban jealousy A LOT the past few weeks as my sister, my cousin Natalie, and myself exchange bitchy tales about what our boyfriends are doing. Well their boyfriends... I don't have one at the moment (obviously. Only someone single has time to step outside herself and see how insane her and the other members of her gender are) But for some reason out of my crazy girl land I can pick out a guy to be jealous of to contribute to these sorts of conversations. Most girls can. Any girl who has a friend bitching about her boyfriend has a guy in her mind that she could talk about equally as much. But anyway... We get SO jealous. At what is usually nothing! An ex girlfriend of one of our boyfriends tweets at him, and instantly we are filled with enough rage to fight the next person that looks at us OR HIM wrong. Our boyfriend seems TO US to be paying more attention to another 'stupid slut' then us, chaos ensues and we make a huge effort to prove we are ignoring our man while punching walls and things and calling the other one crying. We get a text message of who our boyfriend may be innocently hanging out with at that present moment because his friend dragged him somewhere and she just 'happened' to be there and suddenly we're calling our service providers for replacement phones because we have broken ours while hurling it across a room. All of these incidents have happened to at least one of us if not all of us between my sister my cousin and I, but I wasn't going to label it because they probably wouldn't be to stoked about that. I'm telling you, fucking psychos.
There is a silver lining gentlemen. For the most part a lot of girls can keep all the feelings I mentioned above bottled up inside. 'But wait Cassandra, I've dated crazy girls before who got jealous over everything and said something every time.' Well sir, for everything she told you she was jealous of, there were 3 more things that she was jealous of but kept quiet about. 'Cassandra I've dated girls that would get mad all the time when I would supposably 'ignore her' they don't bottle that in.' Yes they do. For as mad as she got, times it by 10, because that's how mad she really was. Mmmm passive aggressiveness strikes again!
How am I in a relationship? I'm not sure. Guys fall in love with me quickly, I know that. They all end differently I know that too. My advice to guys is to find girls with good girlfriends who don't hate you. Girls with good girlfriends are able to bitch and moan and cry about every little thing you do that we completely blow out of proportion, and you never have to hear it because we are just talking to them. And they like you, so they can talk us down from it all. If they don't like you, you're fucked. And if your girlfriend chooses you over her friends, run. Run for the hills. You've got a clingy girl thats going to demand you to be the best boyfriend and now best friend she's ever had. Face it guys, you don't give a shit about 3/4 of the stuff we talk about.

you should still totally date me though...

I'm no expert, so if you happen to come across my blog and happened to read this and also have read this far, I'm just talking what I know. I could be wrong about all this. This is just my personal experience.
But I do feel better getting it all out.

1 comment:

  1. fuck that girl. STOP TALKING TO HIM! She is driving me crazy!